Oh Merriment

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"So tonight gotta leave that nine to five upon the shelf,
And just enjoy yourself"
- Michael Jackson

I wasn't going to go.

Even though I was excited to see the email pop up in the inbox. I wasn't going to go. I wasn't going to ask if it was ok for me to go. Since I'm not exactly on the company's payroll, I wasn't sure if the invitation extended to me. My way of keeping a safe distance from this place and these people that I am really, really growing to like. My way of safeguarding myself against that familiar disappoint of thinking that I am a member of the team, only to be reminded otherwise. My very basic way of self sabotage. Apparent because I am the only person that I would be kidding by believing that I did not want to go. I love holiday office parties! I've gotten to hang with my bosses and co-workers in a more relaxed setting, get to know their families, gotten gifts and let's not even get started talking about that nice holiday bonus check, what's not to love about holiday parties?

I wasn't going to go.

But, my co-workers kept coming in, one by one, asking me if I was going, telling me that I should go. And when I asked the office manager if that invitation extended to me, her reply was "of course!" I was glad I went. The glass of wine with management was nice, meeting the husbands and wives was great, and getting Baby Squares orders in the process was the best. A true lesson to self to see every single opportunity, no matter how small, as one that can be beneficial. Lesson learned.