Redefining 'The List'

I don't know about you, but my life revolves around lists. I make them for EVERYTHING. Grocery shopping, things that I need to get done, random thoughts swimming around in my head, bills that need to be paid, whatever you can think of, I've probably made a list for it or of it. It just helps me to be able to see things more clearly, kinda like being able to see the bigger picture of a day/week/month/experience. And still, a couple of days ago I had a 'list' aha moment.

I was reading Lisa Nichols' article, Go From Stressed to Blessed, in this month's issue of Essence Magazine. Out of her list of ten ways to achieve transformation in the new year, it was the 2nd suggestion that really struck a cord with me.

START WITH YOUR "ALREADY DONE" LIST. What did you accomplish in 2011? When were you at your strongest, and what lessons did you take from those experiences? ... Focusing on what you did well will give you the momentum to create the life you most want to have in the new year.

This really sounds like a no-brainer, but out of all the lists that I've made, I don't think I've ever created one to showcase the things that have gotten done. When something on a To-Do list is completed, it just gets checked off or crossed out, which made me realize that by doing so, those achievements are just forgotten - replaced by the next thing to-do. There really isn't any effort to let a 'job well done' marinate. Well, I've heard you Ms. Nichols and that practice stops now.

Grab yourself some post-its and create your own list of accomplishments!

Moments of Bliss

Living Room: Still a work in progress...

A year ago, I was laying in a full sized bed, with an arm cuddling my baby while a hand cradled my Galaxy S. Two sets of eyes peering into the beauty of Avatar as the clock struck midnight. We were in the family wing of a homeless shelter. Five family units with revolving doors. Four families went off to forever homes, while three more settled into the temporary serenity of three meals a day + bed and bath that didn't have to be shared. The Hotel, as Emma liked to call it. The most memorable fragment of our shelter stay was my transformation into double agent - gaining a status as participant and observer, with a focused view on what a homeless family really looked like.

I was not the only single mother, nor were the families comprised of only single mothers. Among us was a husband and wife with a troop of four, and a girlfriend and boyfriend with a set of brand new babies, and the thought process changer: the single dad with the toddler son, and the two little girls who clung to us women with hugs and requests for sleep overs because they were missing their mother so much. Yes, we all had our stories, and for a brief period in our lives we became a collective, sharing child care advice, academic support, and guidance on the right and wrong ways to comb and care for little natural curls. And when it was time to move on, we congratulated each other and waited for our own happy endings.

As 2011 became 2012, it was evident how much things have changed for us. At midnight, I was in the comfort of my own home, smiling into my computer screen as I shared a New Year's toast with my grandparents via Google Video Chat, and a loving glance at my sleeping baby cuddled up next to me on the couch. A shiny moment of pure bliss.

And as the sun rose and prepared to set on the very first day of this brand new year, a grand feast of Hoppin' John and fixins helped my bliss hang around just a little bit longer.

I hope that all of you had an exhilarating start to 2012. May the prosperity be in abundance for us all.

Make It Work!

Project #1: Making my new kitchen work for me

What do you do when you don't have enough kitchen cabinets, or counter space, or a storage closet!?! You have to build from the ground up. I have a ridiculous amount of boxes marked KITCHEN, and a ridiculously limited amount of space in which to empty those boxes. Dinnerware from lives past, pots and pans, electrical this and that, TUPPERWARE! There just isn't room for it all. I came up with a solution for a fair number of cookware. An additional kitchen cart, to the microwave cart that I already had. I was storing my skillets and pots on this little thing. It was never going to work. I spotted this 5 shelf kitchen cart on Walmart's website and thought that it could get the job done. So far, mission accomplished. No more boxes of cookware! Dinnerware is a completely different story for a completely different post.

Have you added any new space savers to your home lately?

Buried Treasures

When you've reestablished an uninterrupted connection to the outside world, via Ethernet cable, you know things are really starting to look up.

I've been sitting amongst boxes for the past few days, happy to have had a good friend who didn't mind loaning me her husband for a couple of hours. A few boxes and a desk still before it's all in, but we're getting there. Our empty little shell is starting to come alive with memories of yesterday, and will soon be flooded with the fresh roots of our brand new start. Starting over, it can't possibly be as bad as this passing period of being back at the bottom. Time to restart the journey back to the top.

As stressful as this transition still is, reconnecting with my life brings comfort. I spent time looking through photo books, and the scrapbook that chronicle's Emma's life 17 weeks post conception 'til a few months past her 1st birthday. A unbreakable bond we have. I cherish the one and only photo I have of myself while she was still inside of me, and remind myself how grateful I am that, at 7 months pregnant and in the middle of getting dressed, I asked my Bigmama to snap a picture of me.

For 5 years, I've had a couple of unopened boxes of Bigmama's belongings. Just dishes, glassware I'd always suspected. But tucked away with the glass I found a few other things, things that immediately jumped out at me. A double sided vanity mirror. I remember. I remember it was used to help her get her look just right when she was pressing and curling her hair. Now, it will stand on my own vanity. And a plate, with a message about all of the love that a small house holds, that my small house now holds. Yeah, starting over isn't gonna be bad at all.

Looking Toward Tomorrow

I was at my grandmother's house when I got the call. I had been expecting it. And although all of the I's were dotted and the T's crossed, I was expectedly nervous. It could have gone either way, and I tried to prepare myself for that.

It was the property manager, calling to give me the final decision. I stepped away into an empty room to receive the news. He told me that the owner had decided that she'd like to rent to me. Say what now? And just like that, all was well in my mind. I'd just received the best Christmas gift EVER! Ain't nothing better than a brand new permanent address, especially when you've spent the last ten months without one.

I've decided not to share the news with Emma. Partly because I want to shield her from any potential disappointment should something unexpected happen and the deal falls through. And of course I want to shield myself from her daily move-in date inquiry that is already foreseen. But most importantly, I want to present this gift to her in the most meaningful of ways. A good old fashioned surprise.

Here's the plan. I want to move some of our things in, preferably her things, pick her up from school and take her there. Unlock the door and show her to her new room. I can see it now, and i'll try to make sure that you do too by remembering to get some pictures of the special moment when it all goes down.

So, when are we moving in? That is still being determined. I can say that it will be soon! Watch us take flight as we chase a housewarming!

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Conventional and Unconventional

2011 rang in, cuddled up with my love, with Avatar playing on the little screen, raindrops on my window pane, gunshots throughout the neighborhood, and I think, a few fireworks mixed in for effect.

Oh, and this morning, during my first of the year potty run, I discovered that my underwear were wrong side out. Sign of good luck to come perhaps?

Happy New Year!

I Got This!

Well, I've almost survived the entire day of my first official day in the office. That's right, almost, as in I am coming to you straight from my desk, at my new office, surrounded by my office supplies, typing on my computer. I'm owning this moment ya'll =). As I sit here staring into the screen, I am reminding myself that I really do enjoy being bored half way out of my mind underworked as opposed to overworked. There is a lot of down time here, which would have been fabulous back when I was taking classes and had stuff to read and papers to write. I'm content though, since I am still free to read books that no one is making me, and write blog posts... and read blog posts, and check out the latest Facebook status updates, and repeatedly check my email, while saying hello to the few co-workers who peep in throughout the day, and answering the few calls that come through. Life is pretty NON-STRESSFUL here - just what the doctor ordered.

I've been nervous all week about having my first official day here, alone, but I came right in and dived right in. The instructions that I was introduced to during my one-day training were simple and the day's mandatory stuff was accomplished quickly. I was nervous about the phones. So far so good. Requests and inquiries have not been out of the ordinary, I have not had to phone a friend, its been great. With a little under 3 more hours to go in this first work day, I am already looking forward to getting back here tomorrow for the second half of my first weekend!

31 Days of Reflection

33 posts in 31 days. Not bad. Not that I was necessarily trying to set a record, but rather attempting to dedicate a little time to myself within this space. Mission accomplished. I've managed to stop in here, if not once a day, multiple times a day to unload my mind - to reflect on the day's events. Its been a pretty eventful August. I made some decisions, and got some results. I'm keeping with that. I'm still on the grind, still hustlin' - side and otherwise.

First Day on the Job

I sat out early, and arrived about 30 minutes before I was scheduled to start getting to know the office, and my new role. I was welcomed by the woman I will be replacing, and she was delighted to meet another person who loves to be fashionably early. Upon pulling into the parking lot I had no idea what to expect. I was about to enter a high end firm, in a well off city, where I was told that I'd be interacting with those who live in million dollar homes. Exciting and a little unsettling all at the same time. Once behind the doors, I saw that I had nothing to fear. I listened attentively as the current receptionist broke down the front desk duties, I took notes, and asked questions, and little by little I became more comfortable. By the end of the day, she was in my seat, and I was in her's, answering phones, working on the end of day business, and chatting up a storm like we'd been working together for years.

I presented myself like I was comfortable in my own skin, and I think I was received well for it. Keeping in mind that this position has come about via a temp agency, I am choosing to treat it as an opportunity instead of just a gig. Its suppose to be long term, and I want to ensure that it will be. Although today's training was kind of an "everything in one day" kind of deal, I think I have a good understanding of the basics, and I am confident that I will fall right on into the groove of things with a couple of weeks of being on demand. After labor day, I'm on. Until then, I will be reflecting and preparing. A few more pieces to the work wardrobe, follow up with my temp agency and the organization that I have been working with for the last week, and I should be headed in a brand new direction!

When All Else Fails

Since I've managed to completely kill A Place of Comfort, I've decided to do what I should have done in the very beginning, create a new blog. Seems like I have so many already, I didn't want to add yet another to the mix, but alas, here we are. The fact that I managed to break my site feed for all of my followers... probably twice, is a huge indicator that I'm not lying when I say that I am existing within a very disordered life. And that would be, Disorder, in every since of the word. I suppose that having no followers at all isn't an extremely bad thing, but I've made friends, and I'm lonely over here without them. If you can hear me, I'M LONELY WITHOUT YOU!!! Please find me here, so that my words don't bounce off this screen and haunt me. I'd much rather them bounce from me to you, and from you to me... that way I don't go completely insane... without witnesses.

Reason for the Change:

It was time. I started A Place of Comfort because it was what I needed in my life. A place where I could carve out some time for myself, and get back to doing what I've always loved to do: write. 2 years later, I can't exactly say that I have rekindled my passion for writing, I can't say that I have fully utilized the space for doing me... I can't say that I grew while in that space. I think I spent the first year trying to find my voice. Was I suppose to be a "mommy blogger" because I was a mother? Was I suppose to always be writing for an audience? Was A Place of Comfort suppose to become a business? I didn't know what the rules were. It took a while to figure out that the only rule of the blogosphere is to be yourself. With new realizations come the need, the desire for new beginnings, new spaces to thrive and grow. Thus, Chasing Metamorphosis.

Frankly, I am dying to emerge from my cocoon.