When you've reestablished an uninterrupted connection to the outside world, via Ethernet cable, you know things are really starting to look up.
I've been sitting amongst boxes for the past few days, happy to have had a good friend who didn't mind loaning me her husband for a couple of hours. A few boxes and a desk still before it's all in, but we're getting there. Our empty little shell is starting to come alive with memories of yesterday, and will soon be flooded with the fresh roots of our brand new start. Starting over, it can't possibly be as bad as this passing period of being back at the bottom. Time to restart the journey back to the top.
As stressful as this transition still is, reconnecting with my life brings comfort. I spent time looking through photo books, and the scrapbook that chronicle's Emma's life 17 weeks post conception 'til a few months past her 1st birthday. A unbreakable bond we have. I cherish the one and only photo I have of myself while she was still inside of me, and remind myself how grateful I am that, at 7 months pregnant and in the middle of getting dressed, I asked my Bigmama to snap a picture of me.
For 5 years, I've had a couple of unopened boxes of Bigmama's belongings. Just dishes, glassware I'd always suspected. But tucked away with the glass I found a few other things, things that immediately jumped out at me. A double sided vanity mirror. I remember. I remember it was used to help her get her look just right when she was pressing and curling her hair. Now, it will stand on my own vanity. And a plate, with a message about all of the love that a small house holds, that my small house now holds. Yeah, starting over isn't gonna be bad at all.